At Sanskar’s Apartment
“What do you think is going on over there?” Laksh
asked while falling onto the couch. “I know for a fact that first she scream
and shout and ask him to leave” Rohan answered, “Knowing Sanskar, he’s not
going to leave from there” Ragini laughed “Poor Shona. She has never seen how
persuasive and stubborn Sanskar can be”. Laksh sighed and said “I want my
brother alive tomorrow”. Rohan laughed and said “I think we should switch off
our phones, she might try contacting us and we’ll have no choice but to go
back”, “I’ll call Sally and tell her to lie to Swara if she calls” Laksh said.
“And I will get us coffee”
Swara’s Apartment
“UGH, why is everybody’s phone switched off?” she
scowled at her phone; then she dialled another number while Sanskar gave a
knowing smile. Ragini had messaged him already that the three of them would be
out of reach, “Hello? Sally. Good evening. Is Rohan there?” she spoke into the
phone. She heard what Sally said “What kind of paperwork will go on till night?
Anyway ask him to call me as soon as he can” she kept the phone down,
irritated. “So if you are done with your CID research, mind telling me what
you’d have for lunch?” Sanskar asked her. She gave him a sarcastic smile and
said “How about some rat poison? At least I’ll be free of this torture”, “I
don’t mind, do you have a preferred flavour, baby?” he asked with the same
sarcasm. “Don’t call me baby again. Ever” she hissed. He gave an uncaring shrug
and went to the kitchen. “I will starve than eat your food” she shouted at him,
and then she heard a laugh which made her even more irritated.
After a while when Sanskar came to the living room,
he saw she fell asleep on the couch, she had become so weak because of the
fever, he went closer to her, kneeled beside her and patted her hair. “For how
long will you keep this hatred in you, Shona? Why can’t you see it is slowly
destroying you and watching you like this, it is destroying me too” he
whispered. She woke up with a jerk and noticed how close he was to her, they
looked into each other’s eyes for a few seconds, and in those few seconds, the world
stood still for them, time froze, and they felt a strong force between them,
completing each other. Then she realized the distance between them was
decreasing, he realised what was happening and moved back and said “Umm, I came
to wake you up. Lunch is ready”, he looked at her, she was still recovering
from their intense moment, and she composed herself and said “I do not want to
eat”. “I am not asking you Swara, I am telling you to eat your lunch. You need
to take your medicines” he said in an authoritative tone. She was taken aback,
but she kept her ground “I said I do not want to eat” she got up from the couch
and walked towards her room, when Sanskar caught her by her arm “I get it, you
hate me. But I will not allow you to risk your health over your hatred for me.
Do not test my patience Swara. Sit down and eat” he ordered her. She opened her
mouth to retort back, but words failed her, not a single sound came out of her
mouth. She reluctantly went to the dining table with Sanskar following her “I’m
not going to run away from here” she murmured. He gave a small laugh and they
had their lunch in silence.
After lunch Swara sat in the couch with her eyes
closed. “Your medicines” she opened her eyes to see Sanskar handing out her
medicines to her. She tried to rebel but realised that she had no energy left
in her. She took the medicines and again sat with her eyes closed leaning on
the couch. “Why don’t you lie down in your room” Sanskar suggested. “This is my
home Mr Maheswari, not your office where I need to follow your orders” she said
without looking at him. He sighed and sat beside her “Swara, I –” he started to
speak when she cut him off “Mr Maheshwari, I am not interested in whatever you
have to say. Please leave me alone” she said. “Will you stop calling me Mr
Maheshwari for heaven’s sake?” He asked
in an irritated tone. “You’re my boss Mr Maheshwari and I am not interested in
moving any further than that” she replied staring at the ceiling “Since you wouldn’t
leave, and very frankly I am not in a state to take care of myself, is the only
reason I’m letting you stay. The moment Rohan arrives, you are free to leave”
she retorted. He felt as though someone had punctured his heart “You will have
to listen to me Swara, I cannot live like this anymore” he said in a restless
tone. “Mr Mahe-“ she started to say “DON’T CALL ME THAT” he screamed and
seconds later he felt as though someone had deflated his lungs, he stood up and
paced around to calm down, while Swara stared at him shock.
“Five years ago, what happened was my mistake. I should
have told you about Kavita. Before anything happened, I should’ve clarified
everything. I didn’t do the one thing I should’ve done. I am sorry Swara, I don’t
know how else to apologize” still pacing around “Five years Swara, I have lived
in isolation, without you, without Ragini and it took Laksh a long time before he
could forgive me. Mom and Dad couldn’t figure out what was wrong with e and the
sad part is I couldn’t tell them either. Five years I spent looking for you
like a maniac and every time I came close to you, you disappeared. Do you know
how frustrating was that?” “When I saw you for the first time, something pulled
me towards you. I couldn’t take my eyes off you. Remember that night when we
went clubbing and two guys were trying to get close to you, I swear to God I would’ve
buried them there of you didn’t hold my
hand at that moment, remember that you had too much to drink that night? I’ll
tell you what you said to me, you asked me why are you pulled towards me, why
do you feel a strong connection with me” he looked at her “Do you know how It
affected me? If you weren’t drunk I would’ve have made you mine then and there”
“And then seeing you at the wedding, that passion I had buried erupted, when I saw
you, I forgot everything Swara. EVERY DAMN THING. I did not even remember that
Kavita existed in my life, until I saw her that day. That day my world
shattered. The girl I loved left me forever for one mistake of mine. So if you
think that it is only you who has suffered in the past five years, you are
wrong Swara. I have suffered too. When I finally saw you after five years, I cannot
explain how I felt, happy will be an understatement. Swara please, I know
apologizing is not enough but that is all I have to offer, and I am exhausted
now Swara, exhausted of feeling this way. Please Swara, I am begging you for
forgiveness, I am begging you to give my life back, I am begging you to give me
my Swara back” he sank down and sat on his knees with tears in his eyes.
Swara heard everything he had to say, this was the
conversation she had been avoiding because she knew the moment this
conversation happened she would fall weak, she stared at the floor with tears
in her eyes “You think it is only about Kavita? I had never been in love before
you Sanskar, I never had the connection with anyone but you” she wiped her
tears looked at him and continued “I remember that feeling I got when I first
met you, that feeling never left me Sanskar, I remember that night at the club,
I remember how I managed to calm you down when you were angry, I remember how
happy I was when I knew that I had that sort of an effect on you. I remember
what I told you when I was drunk, I remember you took me to my room and kissed
on my forehead” she saw Sanskar staring at her with surprise in his eyes “That
day during the engagement when I was about to fall from the stairs, I knew it
was you who saved me even before looking at you, that day of haldi when we had
an intimate moment, you kissed on my nape, I still carry that feeling with me,
that tingling feeling I had when your lips touched my skin, that feeling of my
heart falling out of chest when our lips were about to meet” she looked him
into the eyes “That feeling when you confessed your love for me, that feeling which your burning
gaze gave me. Every feeling that you have me is engraved in my heart Sanskar,
no matter how much I try I never got rid of it, and then I figured out why. For
every feeling that you gave me, I lost a piece of me, that day when Kavita
came, and she told me that she’s your girlfriend, I lost such a huge part of me
that it left a hole in my heart. Even today when I look into the mirror I cannot
recognise myself Sanskar. I too have suffered in all these years and even I am
exhausted” she said with a sinking feeling.
They both stared at each other; both of them didn’t know
what to say. The silence between them was torturing both of them. “Swara, can
you please give me another chance?” Sanskar asked but she could see his eyes were
begging. She wanted to reach out to him and console him, because she realised
that they both had suffered in these past years and that both of them had lost
a lot. Am I ready to give us another chance? She thought to herself as he
looked at her with hope.
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